Good morning, friends. To be honest, I am having a real hard time with the reading schedule for Ephesians. You may have noticed that with my lack of regular posting.
I think that because I typically read bigger passages at a time, I am having a tough time with the smaller morsels. I see incredible value in taking it slowly, but I am having a hard time doing it this way.
So here is what I will do:
I will continue reading Ephesians, but I’m not going to do it on a pre-set schedule. (This is a big deal for me to go off a reading schedule like this!!) I want to slow down at some parts, pondering sentence by sentence, and take in other parts in bigger chunks, thinking about the bigger picture.
I invite you to explore along with me, but I cannot tell you what our schedule will be. I need to listen to God each morning and go where He takes me. Because of this, I make no guarantees of any reading schedule or even posting schedule, but I will share as I feel fit to share and keep moving forward as He directs. (And this is where I am thankful MomsToolbox is my own, and is a work motivated purely by love rather than an income source…. you did know this is a hobby from the heart, not a paying gig, right?)
If you are enjoying the Ephesians schedule which Candace from His Mercy is New created, then, by all means, please keep rolling ahead, reading, praying and writing the scriptures. She’s set out a great plan for you.
If you’d like to take things in at my pace, or read at your own and then check out my reflections, you are welcome to do that, too. Whatever path you choose, I am thankful to have you check in when you do and even more thankful you are taking in His Word.
So what did I read and hear today?
Today I chose to read all of Ephesians 2.
Here is something that pulled me in for a closer re-read:
For by grace you have been saved though faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.
Eternal life is a big deal. It is a big gift. And it is ours, no matter if we try hard to be the best, or if we just accept it.
I’m an achievement-oriented person. The words of Ephesians 2:8-9 sound great to me, and, on the surface I love them. I’ll be honest, though. They are hard to really fully accept completely. Sure, they are fine to use in reassuring someone else. “Relax, honey, you don’t need to prove anything to God or anyone else, just soak in His love….”
And yet, I feel this incredible drive to do and achieve in almost anything I do. I want to do well or not do it at all. I don’t think I am doing so to earn love, but am I?
I feel confident of God’s love of me and my odds at eternal life with Him.
But yet, I still wonder about the achievement-oriented nature of mine in all things. Why do I push myself as I do, and then beat myself up when I cannot accomplish everything to my crazy high standards? Why do I even think I can meet all the crazy high standards? What is good enough without guilt or explanation?
The biggest love of all, the most important thing, is right here for me to just accept and, quite frankly, any true love should be ours for just soaking in and enjoying, no works obligated. All those works we do should be carried about because we are inspired to do them out of our love right back. But how far does that need to go? How perfect do those actions need to be? Why do we push ourselves to do way more than is needed? Is it love? Or is it something else.
I’m going to think about this a bit.