Happy Saturday! I am sorry I missed you yesterday. If you follow the MomsToolbox Facebook page, you know yesterday was a rough morning and I was unable to post.
This morning I am flying to Las Vegas to speak about my company at IBM’s Insight conference. The last time I flew to Las Vegas, I was going there to attend a dear friend’s wedding and what would become Hurricane Ike was making a path towards Houston. My flight home was delayed by a day and our home was without power for more than a week. This morning, another massive storm is on its way, once again. This time the destruction shouldn’t be nearly as severe in my area, but it will be worse for others. Eeek. Please pray for those in the storm’s path, as well as those facing all sorts of storms in their lives.
There have been some storms brewing in my personal life, too. I prefer not to go into much detail, but today’s passage, which was also yesterday’s passage had a good reminder to me to humble myself before the Lord.
Here’s what I heard in Psalm 51 by applying SOAP:
Scripture: Psalm 51: 2-3
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!
For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
Help me to move past my sin. I know what I did wrong and I want to move forward. You can clear it away from me and I am calling out to you to do so.
Thursday was a frustrating day.
I kept my cool for most of it, but, at the end, the perfect storm of professional struggles, parenting struggles, personal attacks against me, time to ponder those attacks while driving alone in the car, and one of my children’s disobedience later that night, swirled around and brought out some behavior that I regret. I let my frustration get the better of me and, instead of keeping my cool, I lost it and might have raised my voice a little more than I should have. Or I might have even yelled. Okay, I yelled at my child. This child was in the wrong, but responding the way I did was not the mature thing to do. I allowed myself to let my emotions get the better of me and I made the situation worse.
I am so irritated with myself. I need to move on… recognizing my mistake, planning ways to be better next time, and also forgiving myself. I sure know my transgression. My sin sure is before me. I need Him to wash it away and I also need to be gracious with myself as He will be and move forward.
Lord, I sure messed up. I hate that. It makes me mad and embarrassed that I let my emotions take hold of my actions and I raised my voice like I did.
Thank you, Lord, for this reminder of your grace and forgiveness. Please, Lord, wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! Please clear my record and help me to move forward in your grace and also extend grace to those around me, including my children.
Please guide me in making better choices the next time I get so frustrated. Help me to call this verse to mind and see how you forgive, so that I can calm down, take a breath, and move forward in the best way.
I love you, Lord. I love my children. Thank you for your forgiveness and for your them. You are amazing and you so often shine your incredible love and blessings on me. Thank you.
Please, Lord, give me the strength I need to love and live as you would have me do. I am so sorry.